I sometimes thinnk it is. I dont think its such a bad approach to take, sometimes. Here is what scares me, and sorry if this beginning part gets confusing haha
My second cousin who is 31 has had type 1 since she was 13, and the same as her little sister who is now 28. Their dad (my geat uncle) who is in his 60's now is also type one, has had it for quite sometime and his little brother (my great uncle also) passed away almost 4 years ago at the age of 52 from a heartattack, which we beleive was caused by his diabetes and lack of care and diet over the years. R.I.P. we miss him every day.
Now my cousin who is 31 had a heart attack about 7 months ago, at the age of 31 let me remind you. This scares me so much, not for myself but for her. She almost passed away at the age of 31 and I wish I could do something to help. This was one of the worst days that I can remember having in a long time, you just nver know what is going to happen. Im not sure if it was lack of care or exercise, but she had a heart attack at 31, Thank God she is ok. Now after my great uncle who passed, and my grandma (my two uncles' sister) died at 56 from a heart attack. This makes me think, well my cousins take pretty good care of them selfs (from what I know) and this kind of stuff is happening and the family history of heart problems we have.
I just get so scared sometimes and think, no matter what I do, something is bound to happen because of this damned disease (pardon my language). I want her to be okay, I want my family members to be okay, I want all of you to be okay, but is it one of those things that we just have to understand, that well, this is evidently the outcome we are going to get? I dont want to go early and it keeps me up late at night. Im so worried about her and the rest of my family being okay and I wish I could just do something for them, and I know there is nothing I can do but pray for them and do what I can on my end. They are all great people that I love having in my life, especially for support and everything else. I dont want this to decide my fate, or any one elses fate, Im always told we can live normal lives, but 31/heart attack is not normal and I pray every night that it wont happen again and that she starts to become healthier.
I know that fear should be the last thing driving me to take care of my self, because the negativity of fear can bread more negativity and thats just never a good thing. I want more positive motivation and Im looking for it, its just so hard to find some times.
Andrew - I understand what you are saying - I'm 39 coming up on my 31st D b-day and my 40th reg b-day. For the past few years I've been experiencing some joint issues - both shoulders, both hips and a back issue. I convinced myself that the D did it to me and I was down for quite a while. It just gets to you. There isn't a magic bullet for us to say "this is it" or "this will get me past it". I do know that doing some of the JDRF or ADA bike rides has given me a positive outlook. It also helped my family a bit to step up their health game. None have diabetes like yours but we have enough heart and cancer issues to make them worried.
I don't think you have to think of the fear as a negative thing. You could focus on just being healthy as your positive motivation. I saw you are studying to be a personal trainer - keep at it. It won't happen over night but I would guess that your family may look at your progress as inspiration for them. Saying things sometimes has the opposite effect so maybe just seeing you do your thing will push them along a healthier path. You can even use that as your positive motivation now that I think about it - the better you are doing, the better they will want to be. I know I look at others for inspiration so it's not beyond the relm of possibility. Best of luck to you. Be well.
hey Andrew, I am headed to my 44th birthday in a few weeks... 31 years with diabetes and yea, I know a few who haven't made it too.
One word: Perspective.
No amount of Worry ever did any amount of good. take care of yourself the best you can every day, that's a good thing. Paralysis because you are afraid is a bad thing. so is losing sleep or being adrift in your mind during the holidays or family times. Because once an instant has passed you do not get to do it over again. YOU determine what you do with the knowledge of your own eventual demise. it can be something good or not-so-good.
-Comedians have said it as a goof but it is worth remembering - everybody dies of something - no one gets out of this alive.
-it can be a cop-out (no need to take care of myself) or a source of humor(eat right, exercise, die anyway) or something of an education - I will take the best care of myself that I can everyday and I will not forget to enjoy my life to the fullest extent possible. Ya can't go back in time, the past is over. No one knows what the future is going to bring, all you have is right now.